My life began to fall apart problematically about two years ago. I was married with two small children (spoiler alert: I still am). We all lived in a cramped flat in New York, and I was somewhere in my career when I believed things should be getting better, but they weren’t. Everyone else had a Subaru and a house in upstate New York. What had I gotten myself into? My connections had always been rough, but as my cohort grew older and began to have children of their own, I discovered that I had fewer and fewer close friends on whom I could rely. My marriage was always tumultuous, but recently it was tumultuous all day. Meanwhile, my emotions were out of control. I got torn between squid-ink wrath and existential squid-ink darkness.

My entire life has got spent with me only. That misery was me, no matter how wretched I was, if that makes sense. As a result, I did not seek expert assistance. Who would I be if this constricted mass of muck that was me was destroyed, I worried? I was terrified of what counseling may disclose, of letting go of the coast and drifting into deep water, and of having to put my feelings into words.

I’m fairly convinced I would never have gone to counseling if I hadn’t had children. But, amid what I assumed to be a mental breakdown—what I later understood to be an episode of emotional dysregulation—I attempted suicide. It was a difficult situation. Achilles, our five-year-old son, spoke to me through the door to our bedroom. He had no idea what was going on, only that something wasn’t right. And because it’s too sad to explain to a five-year-old you love that what you’re doing in the bedroom is dangling from the closet rod with a leather belt around your neck (which is also difficult to describe with a said belt around your neck), I eventually emerged and lived. Seeking aid was a life or death situation for me at the time.

Even then, I hesitated because I was afraid. But what terrified me more than going to counseling was the prospect of not going. The evidence that I was suffering from mental illness was unmistakable, as was the fact that it was impacting the people I cared about. Because I have children and adore them, I felt I needed to get assistance, not so much for myself as for them. I’m too twisted up to be happy right now. My children need happiness and a father who can freely love and be loved. The idea of passing on my unresolved issues—or, more accurately, the contortions that formed like calluses around those issues—made me sick to my stomach.

As a result, I wound up in counseling with Julia, a lovely lady. There were people just like me chatting to people just like her all around me, in that office space and adjacent buildings. Looking at her ready-to-pluck tissues and well-hugged crushed-velvet pillow, I thought to myself, “How cliché.” Week by week, though, it felt great to be able to talk to someone who wasn’t angry with me for a decade of insanity, who could see me with compassion and professional compunction. What difference does it make if I pay her $200 an hour?

After a while, Julia indicated I might have a borderline personality disorder, a set of symptoms that includes suicide ideation and attempts, excessive wrath, impulsive conduct, and black-and-white thinking, all of which I had labeled as my own in the coat check of ego. That character I wore and referred to as “myself”; that guy who pounded walls and burst into rages; that guy who tumble-dried in the shape cycles: who was he? I’m not one of them. Not at all. I discovered that I could let go of that image of myself. The more I learned about BPD, the clearer it seemed to me what caused what and why. I’m not denying that I’m to blame for the anguish I’ve caused others. I am who I am. But I didn’t have to be as hard on myself as I had been.

Unfortunately, there is no medical treatment for BPD, no prescription that will make you stop being a crazy guy. BPD will be my continuous companion because part of the condition is biochemical my mind is hard-wired to believe those I love the most are continually attacking me. Because it’s genetic, it’s also possible that it’ll get passed down to my sons.

My marriage was not saved by counseling. Counseling will not allow me to travel back in time to relieve my children’s terror or forward in time to alleviate their suffering. But what it did, and why I am still thankful for the past three years of my life, was allow me to understand myself. It’s as if I hadn’t fully sunk my teeth into this planet. Like a fearful marionette, I was separating parts of myself and suspending them. I’ve arrived. I’m pleased in ways I’ve never been before, and sad in ways I’ve never been before. I’m softer where I used to be hard, and looser where I used to be tight. What’s more, you know what? I feel more at ease confessing, “I’m afraid,” I say, but I’m still going to sit on a couch and get to know myself better.

Here are the reasons why reading is a magical habit: 

Reading Books Can Enhance Your Imagination 

Writing is a means of expression. The books are written by a creative genius who used his  or her intellect to unlock the possibilities of many worlds, stories, and people for us. They  introduce us to fresh circumstances that we would not have thought of on our own. 

When our brain gets habituated to picturing circumstances that are far off from reality, it  becomes simpler for us to think on our own, to come up with our own unique stories and  narratives. A previously written material influenced some of the finest works of our time. Art  breeds art, and if you want to improve as a writer or just be more inventive, you must read  more high-quality novels. 

Reading Books Help You Grow As A Person

Reading is said to boost our ability to empathize. We become more compassionate in real  life after reading about diverse personalities and being exposed to their ideas and  vulnerabilities. We become nicer and softer when we empathize with others, and we are  better equipped to comprehend them. We are less prone to perceive individuals in black and  white, as either good or only terrible, if we can put ourselves in their shoes. It broadens our  horizons and hence makes us wiser. 

Furthermore, there are publications specifically meant to assist you in becoming a better  person. Many self-help books are published by experts in psychology or human behavior  who have spent years of research and experience to develop books that will benefit readers  by offering ideas on how to better oneself. We may learn how to break a bad habit or gain a  new perspective on life by reading these books, which will help us become a better version  of ourselves. 

Reading Books Builds Self-Confidence 

When we read, we get a glimpse into the life of the characters that the author has  painstakingly created. We learn about their trials and tribulations, as well as everything else  that happens to them during their lives. We frequently find ourselves in the roles of such  people. When we read anything and realize we’ve gone through something similar to what  the character is going through at the time, we feel less alone in our troubles.

We frequently feel like failures and assume that we are to blame for the unpleasant things  that happen to us. However, reading about a character who has gone through something  similar and eventually overcomes it offers us hope that we, too, will conquer our issues and  that bad things do not only happen to us. It boosts our self-esteem and confidence in our  ability to deal with challenging situations when they arise. Reading teaches us that everyone,  including ourselves, is flawed. 

Reading Books Expands Your Knowledge 

We all know that books offer knowledge on just about everything. You are certain to learn  something new about something by reading a book, which does not have to be an  encyclopedia. Writers spend a lot of time studying their themes and settings, regardless of  what genre they read, and if any facts are presented in the book, they are likely to be real. 

When you’re reading, you could come across something you’ve never considered or heard  of before, and by reading about it, you’ll be inspired to study more about it, and you’ll most  likely discover something entirely new. 

Reading Books Helps With Stress Management 

Reading is a well-known stress reliever. You are transported into another universe, a  separate chronology, when reading, especially fiction. This world has its own set of people  and issues, which distracts us from our worries for a time. Immersion in a book allows us to  escape reality, which can sometimes be enough to alleviate the tension of our problems.

Books can make us cry or laugh, and experiencing these emotions via stimulation may  frequently help us healthily release pent-up emotions. It aids in the discharge of bottled-up  emotions and the installation of a sense of calm. Reading is the most affordable kind of  rehabilitation. 

Reading Books Enhances Analytical Processing 

We normally digest a lot of information when reading. Taking in scenes, feelings, dialogues,  and actions all at once and putting them together to make a tale in our heads. 

It teaches our brain to visualize things and to translate words into pictures. Stimulating our  brains in this way improves our analytical abilities, allowing us to digest information more  quickly in our daily lives.  

Takeaway 

Reading books has the power to turn us into more imaginative, sympathetic, confident,  knowledgeable, and intelligent people. It’s also one of the simplest things to do; all you have  to do is grab a digital or paper copy of a book and start reading. If you can’t afford to buy  paperbacks, there are a plethora of free e-books available through a simple Google search,  so there’s no excuse. It’s never too late to start reading if you haven’t already.

Have you ever seen folks who are always the focus of attention? They have a lovely aspect about them that draws people to them. So, how do they accomplish this? They have a personified personality, to put it simply. Their aura is a representation of their inner self, not just something they’ve learned.

Well, the truth is that anybody and everyone may build such a personality, but you must first gain all of the necessary abilities to thrive in this art. Let’s take a look at some of the ways that everyone may improve their personality development. This technique may be studied and practiced until it is perfected, whether you are an introvert or lack confidence. This post will go through the best strategies and methods for developing that outstanding appealing personality.

Behavior Tips

Always do your best.

It’s critical not only to appear to be helpful; you must do it to be that person. For example, if you notice that someone is in need, you may provide guidance and say, “I believe that if you go to that guy, he will be of assistance to you.” You might also offer a tiny bit of advice. The feelings of satisfaction you experience after helping someone are incredible, and believe me when I say that they will reflect on your face and personality growth.

Is it truly necessary for you to change?

Let’s figure out when it’s time for you to make a change. Assume you’re conversing with someone who is nodding yet uninterested in you or your topic! While conversing with you, the guy is staring at his watch. The individual then switches to another person and converses with them for several hours. As soon as you walk inside the room, there is an immediate sense of quiet. So, break free from your cocoon and look at the world with fresh eyes. You will quickly discover that you must adjust to a new environment.

Work on inner beauty

We all strive for exterior beauty, but while talking, your entire personality is shown, whether you are arrogant, controlling, self-centered, or unconcerned. Everything you do and say is mirrored in your behaviors and mannerisms. As a result, make an effort to improve your inner attractiveness or personality. While having a fantastic appearance takes only a few months, developing a wonderful personality takes years of hard effort to establish the aura and confidence that will make you “a complete man.”

Are you self-conscious

Many individuals are sincere and know how to handle themselves, but they lack confidence and are unable to express themselves adequately. They are afraid; am I correct in my assessment? I’m worried about what people will think of me; will they mock me? These kinds of self-doubt queries put you on the defensive. The truth is that these folks frequently know a lot more than the people speaking. It’s just that they’re afraid of the crowd.

Improve your self-assurance

People will say negatively about you because they are envious of you or don’t want you to become the focus of interest, therefore you must cultivate a carefree attitude, be confident, and think. Another option is to be among your friends and start speaking, build the habit of involvement, and participate in the ongoing debate. Speak less, yet in a relevant way. So that you acquire confidence and those around you see that you are capable of speaking and giving your counsel.

Make Mistakes and Learn from Them

If you’re learning anything new, you’re sure to make errors; be ready to apologize and apologize sincerely. By apologizing, you may establish a respectful relationship with your friends and coworkers. Make amends for your errors, forgive yourself, and move on. Don’t stop until you’ve figured out what went wrong. It may take you years to learn this, and that’s great; at the very least, you’re studying and giving it your all. You are a million times better than others who never attempt and are afraid to confront their introverted nature.

Evaluation (Feedback from others)

Evaluate yourself regularly. Sometimes your peers may say things like, “Wow, I didn’t realize you could bargain so well,” or “Wow, I didn’t realize you could debate things so effectively.” Hey, how did you manage to solve that problem so quickly? If you’re getting these kinds of responses, you’re on the correct course. And it’s getting better. However, if you are not receiving feedback, it is time to choose another method of completing your evaluation.

Self-evaluation

To begin, make a list of the personality qualities that you need to improve on. Public speaking, raising confidence, having a charming attitude, being helpful, socializing, dressing well, and so on. You must first determine what it is that you must work on. Make a list of them on paper and date them, then lookout for the best technique to master that talent. If you don’t have an alter ego or a mentor, look into Google. You may learn what you need to accomplish initially by searching on Google. Take one enhancement attribute at a time, master it, and then move on.

Socialize and expand your network

Today is the age of networking; be social with others, go on trips with friends frequently, and you will get self-awareness and the confidence to travel freely. Second, you know how to communicate and engage with your network, when to take credit for yourself and when to give and help. When you’re around other people, you’ll pick up on things like when to say no and how to say no without hurting them.

Imitate

If you know someone who is amazing at team building and has a wonderful personality, pay attention to him and attempt to be him most of the time to learn how he does things. The more time you spend observing and studying, the more you will comprehend his good and bad aspects. Only the positive attributes should be adopted, not the negative ones. It’s not a bad idea to pick up some tips from your idol. We may have two or more idols with whom we might remain and study at any one time.

Conclusion

Although the following suggestions are straightforward and straightforward, you must have faith in your ability to carry them out. You must not believe that because they are simple, there is no reason to devote time to them. You will fall short of your goal in both mental processes. As a result, remember that slow and steady wins the race.

Prepare yourself for war with yourself! Best wishes for your new adventure; I look forward to seeing you again.

My relationship started perfectly: a tumultuous workplace romance with secret encounters. We applied for marriage at the registrar’s office six months later. Then he quit his job and showed no interest in looking for another. I went to work as a packer. The working conditions were difficult, but the remuneration was adequate. I made the decision that I needed to hang on while my ex-husband looked for me. 

Even though he began an active nightlife, I also supported him financially. I noticed a sleeping figure on the couch as I returned home from work. There was only enough money to buy food. I restricted myself to only shopping and going out. My parents assisted us in purchasing an apartment, and I imagined that the two of us would now renovate in our dreams. That was not the case! All we did was move into a new apartment. 

Then I took drastic actions, including quitting my work. My ex-husband refused to change his views, and he began going to bars at night and returning home in the morning. I was also responsible for all of the household chores. He appeared to be anticipating our separation.

It was difficult at first. I didn’t find work immediately away, but I persevered through all of the challenges. Then I discovered my two lifelong passions: teaching and art restoration. I changed my hairstyle and outfit. 

My social circle has grown over time. The apartment’s design was created entirely by me, and I’ll soon have the comfiest house. Postgraduate study and extensive travel, particularly worldwide, are among the ambitions. What about the ex-boyfriend? He works as a bartender and takes expensive gifts from his new lover with open arms.

Everything Is A Lesson When Pain Is The Teacher

Divorce is painful, yet everything that happens to us in life seems like a lesson when pain serves as the teacher. Perhaps you were overly trusting or preoccupied with your profession. Perhaps you put his or your children’s happiness ahead of your own. Maybe you didn’t do anything wrong and this just happened to you.

There are still great life lessons to be learned, regardless of the reasons for the divorce. Yes, those lessons can be quite difficult, yet they may be just what your soul requires. You also realize that just because your life isn’t going as planned doesn’t mean it isn’t the right one for you. 

It may not be exactly what you wanted, but it’s what you have, and that can be freeing because you understand that life doesn’t always go as planned, and that’s okay. It’s not the end of the world if you don’t obtain the job you truly wanted. 

It’s not a big deal if you don’t get that promotion you wanted. That is simply a fact of life. You may not always receive what you want, but you must constantly try to make the best of what you have, which can be a liberating and empowering skill to master.

You Lose Yourself To Find Yourself

Divorce is a painful experience. It’s as if I’ve died. The grieving process might take a long time, and no one should tell you how long you should be in grief. After your divorce, you lose yourself. You lose your sense of knowing, your self-esteem, your sense of security, your confidence, and possibly even your friends and home. You completely forget yourself, but you gradually resurface.

You eventually understand that it was your marriage, not your divorce, that caused you to lose yourself. You realize that you have lost your identity because of your marriage. You realize you’ve lost your sense of self. Divorce helps you to rediscover yourself, the person you used to be, and it’s a lovely sensation to be “you” again.

Your Appearance Improves

Admit it, when it comes to our appearance, we all fall asleep in marriage. We all become a little sluggish and out of shape. Perhaps we don’t take care of ourselves as well as we did before we married. That seemed like a plus point during the marriage, but now that you’re divorced, there’s no reason.

Final Words

Divorce is a life-changing and painful experience that should be chosen only after all other options for a successful marriage have faded. I believe that all marriages, except those involving violence or chronic infidelity, may be saved, and I would advise anyone considering divorce to seek treatment from a skilled specialist.

They mention that they always have seen others and somewhere they find themselves too fantasizing about the future. They hold the belief that tomorrow their life would be like a bed of roses, all the petals will be in their hand & will get the privilege to live the life ever they wished for. 

And so, why I do not look forward in the same way . . why I always predict that only awful things are gonna happen. 

They always bombard such questions on me but I don’t mind them, because they only know the things which I always showed to them. My two hands, two legs, and a little visage that reflect so-called happiness. They never sank in my soul, they never knew me whole. So, their dictums do not bother me. 

Yet my heart screams on all this, realizing how others hope to have a beautiful life tomorrow, but I don’t. And it can not be ever because they killed my innocence. 

My parents killed my innocence . . I have grown up before the age 

I know you would be astonished to hear this but that’s what the varity is, and I wish I could change that. 

And may some of you would have started jabbering that how she is? She is accusing her own parents, because of whom today she is privileged to live on this earth. 

Well, I hail your opinions, but you should have known that parents too indulge in killing their children’s innocence. Yea they are idioms of love but “sometimes love hurts. Yet, no one acknowledges love as a baneful thing. 

People do not have any clue what happens between the four walls, and so some damages have never been highlighted to this world. 

But that happens, parents ruin their own child’s innocence by showing them the conflict that happens between them, not giving a thought about what they are doing could affect their children. 

All this underlies in a child’s mind that how partners abuse each other, how coming into a relationship or starting a family is not a blissful thing.

I have seen my parents fighting every day, saying the things they were not supposed to say. And to be honest, at that moment I used to feel like I’m an orphan. I know this is so morphing to say, but it was just the way. 

Parents are supposed to be the safest place a child can have, but what if they two start hitting each other. That’s the most ridiculous thing a child could ever see. They think it’s normal to fight at home, no home is untouched by this, and so they continuously do what they wish. 

A little soul who is supposed to cherish in love ” starts cherishing between hatred “; which not only affects emotional competence but even somewhere that’s all start shaping them as a person they’re not supposed to be. 

And yet, after knowing all these parents do not pay heed. They try to shut a child’s mouth by saying I’m feeding you, how much you know about the world, it’s the adult people matter you are not allowed to step in this. 

Somewhere, they teach their child to be quiet & one day this world compels to be. They push their child in the murk, and reverence of children also starts diminishing towards them. 

They stop believing that something fairy tale exists in this world, because their parents, even just for the sake of assurance never showed them at all. 

Innocent souls start believing that life is all about walking on thorns, there is no such beauty hidden behind this dusky world. And just the way my innocence too has been lost 

All my innocence faded somewhere. . I feel I’m in the murk but don’t know exactly where

Just imagine you earned a penny after so much effort, and accidentally someone came and
snatched it from your hand.
How would you feel?
Anger on the top, feeling like someone broke your heart, frustration would too in its way, will
try to kill that person who did with you just before a second.
And just the way others feel, never keep eye on someone’s hard-earned money. Because if
someday the same someone would do with you, then your inner soul rather than
empathizing would despise you.

I paid a price for loving someone

Do you think the heading above is too filmy?

Not only you, anyone will find it filmy which is often heard in movies etc but a tragic story is hidden in the topic which I’m excited to share.

Come along with me.

I still feel butterflies when I remember the days when Raghav and I were dating. Love was in the air. I was the only daughter and my parents loved me and pampered me to such an extent that anyone would be surprised to see me.

My dad was a businessman and right from my childhood I got anything and everything I wished to have.

I was 20 years old then when I was in a relationship with Raghav and that same year I got a BMW as a birthday gift from my parents. Talking about Raghav, he was from a middle-class family and I did not have any problem with it because I had loved him truly, status and money did not matter for me.

We decided to get married and I told my parents about it, they were hesitant to agree and they told me to be careful while making the decision but I was so blind in love that I was okay with anything. Seeing my desperation to marry him they agreed and both the families started the arrangements for our marriage.

And we got finally engaged and married on the 21st of September 2018. No one was happier than me because I was married to my prince charming which I guess every girl dreams of marrying one day. All the rituals were over and I bid goodbye to my parents and then drove off to Raghav’s house.

Everyone welcomed us so well and the people there were very loving and they treated me as if I already was a member of that family. Then we entered our room but Raghav told me he got something very urgent so he had to go out and I acted mature and said: “come soon, dear”.

I woke up the next morning but guess what Raghav had already left for the office. I felt weird but I tried to ignore it thinking I was overreacting. I called him and he told me he had an urgent meeting so he left the home early and asked me to forgive him.

We both smiled and I asked him to come home early. Late in the evening, the doorbell rang and there my Raghav had come home.

I was so happy and we both sat together to drink tea right then my dad called me saying he had a surprise wedding gift for me and asked me to check the email.

I checked it and Oh my goodness he had transferred the farmhouse property, the business to my name and I was on top of the world seeing it. I couldn’t thank God more for blessing me with such a father. Raghav saw it and he congratulated me.

Days passed by and it was our one month anniversary and I had planned a surprise for Raghav. I had already told him to be at home by 6 pm but it was already 9 pm and there was no sign of him. I was so mad at him then. He came back home at 10 pm. As soon as he entered I screamed at him asking why he ignored today’s day and his reply was ” Do you want to hear it? I am not. Interested in spending a minute with you so please let me live my life as I wish” I was broken.

That day he told me the truth behind marrying me. All those weird actions of him which I ignored was the ones which I had to pay attention to but I regret I was so stupid.

He went into the room to bring something, I sensed that anything further could be harmful to me and thank God I was smart enough to place the camera to record everything with one of my phones and called my dad with another telling him to come with the police.

He came and threw the property papers and asked me to sign them and transfer them to his name. He started forcing me and started to slap me when I refused to do so.

I had to be strong at that point and had to work smartly because I had to keep him engaged till the police arrived. I started arguing with him but he was so angry and he screamed saying he just dated me for my money, he never loved me. He forced my hand and asked to sign. Now I had no option then I pretended to sign and I smartly signed in a different way but in anger, he couldn’t see it. He snatched the paper and was about to leave the home after which he had planned to run away when the police were there.

He was caught, so I gave the video evidence to the police and made it clear that the signature was not real. He was arrested and taken from there to jail.

I cried so much hugging my dad but my dad said-” We are always with you. I’m proud of you, my daughter. You were so strong and smart enough to have such a cheater get caught” Yes, till today I feel the pain but I have been overcoming it because I chose to move on because I did not deserve to be depressed as I wasn’t the one to make the mistake. With my parent’s effort and love, I’m living my life once again.

How I Got Cheated By A Scumbag

He stayed in my flat for a few days because it was easier for him to get to work during the holidays. He took his laptop with him, and he said I could use it because mine got damaged at that time.

The fool left several open conversations on the messaging app that was popular at the time. He didn’t log out, thus the notifications continued to appear. We had a huge disagreement a few months prior, and I specifically asked him whether he had ever cheated. My dumbass believed him when he said no.

That day, I discovered he had cheated on me with many individuals. I was enraged, but not shocked. “So I assumed when I asked if you were cheating? you lied, huh” Because I don’t think I was thinking properly, I told him over the phone at work. He freaked me out. (He) began crying and begged pardon, saying things like “I love you” and “It was a mistake.” I encouraged him to calm down and read some of the messages to him.

I remained quiet when he arrived, but I was as enraged as I could be. Then he tried to deceive me by claiming that the discussions were from before we even met.

Idiot, I eventually forgave him a few months later since I didn’t know what else to do. Anyway. He ended our relationship three months later because, in his words, “I want to expand my horizons and see where it leads me.”

What This Betrayal Taught Me

I don’t think I am unique. We’ve all been betrayed at some point in our lives, but it’s possible that what I’ve learned from it is what sets me distinct. I’m honored to share the things that betrayal has taught me with you:

Taking Responsibility Of My Life

I’ve come to realize that I am solely accountable for everything that occurs in my life. Accepting this was difficult for me. It could be for you as well, but the sooner you realize what it is, the sooner you can begin to repair your heart.

Everything we experience, both good and negative, is co-created by us, I’ve learned. As creators, we are entirely responsible for every event, action, and circumstance that occurs in our lives.

I’ve discovered that the actions, decisions, and choices we make have a consequence that leads us to everything we encounter. We are being forced by no one to do anything.

Our deepest sorrows are our greatest blessings

I’ve discovered that we create the ideal environment for individuals to come into our lives to love, hurt, teach, and help us progress.

I’ve discovered that, like certain pebbles, some unpleasant experiences can also be blessings in disguise. It takes suffering, loss, disappointment, and heartbreak for us to learn, transform, and evolve, just as it takes great temperatures and pressure beneath the ground for these rocks to transform into the beautiful diamonds that they are.

You Can’t Change Anyone

Even all the love in the world would not have been enough to change this individual, I’ve learned. You may believe that your love will save and convert them into the person you require. Have faith in me. It’s not possible. “People can’t change people unless they want to change,” my smart daughter says. Only that individual can make changes, and for changes to occur, awareness and a willingness to change must be present.

I’ve come to terms with the fact that I may never know why this individual acted the way he did, and that’s fine with me. Sometimes things are just the way they are. The person you want the most isn’t always the person you’re best off without.

Changing The Stories We Believe

I’ve realized that the things I used to demand from others — happiness, respect, fulfillment, validation, and love – can’t be expected from anybody else.

Nobody can be held responsible for my happiness, I’ve learned. When I show up for life, the more total I am, the more likely I am to attract someone who is equally joyful, whole, and evolved.

I’ve discovered that we live in a reflecting reality and that to attract our perfect relationship, we must first become everything we desire in our partner.

No one can betray you until you betray yourself first

When you work at a low vibration, you leave yourself vulnerable to a field of low frequencies, I’ve discovered. Because energies that vibrate at different frequencies reject each other, there would not have been an opportunity for this individual to enter my life, or at least stay in it for as long as he did, if I had been in a high vibrational condition.

I’ve learned that if you have to put any of your essential principles on the line to be with someone, you’re already betraying yourself. Any connection that demands you to change or compromise any aspect of yourself is not conscious, loving, or responsible.

People can only love you to the extent that they are capable of loving themselves

To feel true love, I’ve realized that one must love without attachment. Nobody is my property.

People will be with me for as long as it is in their soul contract to be with me, I’ve discovered. If things and people resonate with me, they will stay in my life no matter what obstacles or challenges arise. They weren’t meant to be for me if they depart.

I’ve discovered that I don’t have to always be the one to give without receiving. Without my having to ask for it, the appropriate person who will love me will want to give and exhibit love.

Yes, you heard it right. That very night we slept without any food. Do you want to know the backstory of it? Come on with me.

In the year 2010 while returning from Silliguri our parents met with a car accident after which they were deeply injured and they passed away on the way to the hospital. Are you confused why did I use the word “OUR”? The reason is i have two of my younger sisters named as Sharon and Angel.

After my parents i had to take up the responsibility of my sisters. There was no option left except me to quit my education and to work for a living. I was working as domestic helper in houses and using the salary to pay off bills for house as well as for my sisters.

The so called “Financial crisis” was so hard on us. We gave up many desires and aspirations and guess what we had no other option left. Our lives were already bad but it became worst when Angel suffered from cancer. The next obvious things was to take her to the doctor, to have her tests done but the main thing was Money which we were already lacking.

I used up all of my savings for her treatment. Though i was breaking down from within but i had to show up strong for my sisters. With all of these storms in our lives i had a constant faith in God that he is there with us no matter what.

The savings were finishing off and my tension was at its peak. With all of this thought in mind i happen to be walking down the street where a lady was about to fall down because her bp was low i quickly ran and held her from falling.

Right then a man came by and he called the lady as MOM. Wearing perfectly fit suit and well polished shoe the man holds his mother and thanked me for saving his mother from falling down. I smiled and was about to leave where just then he stopped me. I waited then he asked me about my whereabouts, where am i working, family etc.

I told him i work as a domestic helper and he was surprised to know that a young girl working in houses earning for family. I knew he might have known the condition of my life by then. After a couple of minutes he just said a sentence- “Dont worry i will give you a job and will take the responsibilities of your sisters”. It was a great feeling of relief for me but i was still in a dilemma to trust his words. His mother convinced me saying-” Dear the thing that you did today saving my life cannot be compared with the thing that my son has decided to do. Please agree with it”.

And today after 2 years when i remember my past i still feel goosebumps. Today i have been running a NGO where we take care of the children without their parents and taking care of them, understanding their feelings was not at all difficult for me because i had went through all of it. My sisters are completing their bachelors degree in abroad and what else could i have asked for. That one decision changed our lives completely. The journey took a complete U turn. We all are happy now.

The Lesson that i Learnt was that – We should never give up on the hard days. No matter how great the storm seems to be it has its end. The only trick is to stay strong, have faith in God and to continue doing good without any expectations.

The two brothers used to submit their daily savings from their salary to the shopkeeper. The price of the mobile was one thousand rupees. One day, on his way home from work, his younger brother’s shoe exploded because of extremely bad conditions. He was very upset.

When he reached home, he told his brother about the situation and his brother suggested that he should buy new shoes. He strongly denied it and said that “We have to buy a mobile phone to talk to our parents”.

The older brother got up at once and took him to a shop where they saved their money. Arriving there, the younger brother said to the shopkeeper that we need a mobile phone. The other brother said no, we need a  pair of shoes. The shopkeeper said that you should buy both.”We don’t have that much money,” they replied.

The elder brother said no, just give us a pair of shoes. The shoes were worth a thousand rupees. And their total accumulated capital was eleven hundred rupees. After buying the shoe, they had only 100 rupees left.

The shopkeeper was watching all this. The two brothers started walking out of the shop. So the shopkeeper wrote the price of a mobile phone of one thousand rupees as one hundred rupees.

The two brothers were walking out of the shop with very sad faces. The shopkeeper called them and show them the price of the mobile again. They were very surprised. The shopkeeper said that the price of this mobile is Rs. 100. They bought that mobile and thanked the shopkeeper.

After that, they worked hard so much. Gradually, they began to get out of the difficulties of life. They worked hard for their parents and themselves. And they called their parents to them. Now, they were working harder to achieve their goals.

The time came when they made a decision and bought an organization that works for young people.

They bought this organization to start their setup and to give jobs to youth. They started the publicity of their organization and to let people know that this organization is working for the young generation. They made their banner.

It was July and many vehicles were stuck in traffic on the city’s main road. The younger brother was on a routine visit to his factory that suddenly he saw a man. In the blazing afternoon, the man was knocking on people’s car doors. Suddenly, the younger brother’s gaze rose on the man. He was shocked to see that man.

He ordered his driver to bring the man to him. When they both saw each other they were very happy. The two recognized each other Because this was the person who gave him a mobile phone for 100 rupees. Both of them were very happy with each other. He took the man with him to his factory And introduced this man to his elder brother. He also recognized him very well.

They asked him that what you were doing on the road?? He replied that:” I was just begging people to give me money because I haven’t eaten anything from the previous night. After hearing this, they got so emotional. At that time, the man described that his shop has been finished because of financial issues. The man replied, “I am running out of time that you have left behind.”He said that he is facing a financial crisis. After hearing this, the two brothers told that he could work in their factory. He was very happy to hear that. They all smiled and went away.

Lesson:

The lesson we learn from this story is that no matter what the circumstances are, we must fight them and defeat them. Money is something to behold. We still have it today, tomorrow it will be with someone else. So whatever the situation is, Our job should be to stick to our goal.